employed

I am likethisclose to having a permanent job with health insurance and everything. Theoretically I will be signing the offer letter today or tomorrow and starting on Monday. Who knows, really, but it seems pretty certain. I hope. I'm sort of worried about getting time off for my excursions to Montreal and Wisconsin, but hopefully I won't have to change my tickets and also I'm just going to be happy about the steady paycheck and the health insurance and the unlimited library access. Seriously though, I can't wait to go home for Thanksgiving.

On Wisconsin

Umm... so this is what happens when you do a google image search for Wisconsin. I don't really get it either.

Context, sort of.

excellent

This is excellent news. I think the best part, and I'm honestly not being sarcastic, but the best part is that they're raising money for the free clinic with a "Harvest Moon Barn Dance." Also awesome are the recent $1,000 donations that came in unsolicited, because that's how we do things in the St. Croix and Pierce Counties.

Also--
mail that I remembered to bring with me to the work: savings account bank statement ($0.95 interest, bitches), mail from other bank which turned out to be notification that I'm preapproved for a Home Equity Loan, which (a) they already told me that when I opened up my savings account and (b) I still do not own a home, WaMu, so please stop offering to give me a loan based on the equity in the home I do not own, dammit.
mail that I did not remember to bring with me to the work: envelope containing my paycheck from Horrible Temp Agency. Guess I won't be depositing that money today!

Also, after adding "stupid" as a tag once, I've found it applies to everything I write! Awesome!

you can't be me i'm a rock star

So I had the awesomest post yesterday, but sadly it's awesomeness was so great that time itself stopped, by which I mean fucking Safari froze and refused to unfreeze itself, and after waiting forever (where forever=2 minutes, give or take a minute) I gave up and shut Safari, forever losing my awesome post. I think it was about the Packers winning and the crap Jay Z and/or N.E.R.D. song playing on someone's car stereo at 11:45pm last night. Because that's the best time to play "Rock Star" with added bonus Jay Z "rapping"--apparently he wasn't satisified with ruining that Punjabi MC song with his "rapping" and decided Pharrell was in for some Jay Z song-ruining. If in fact it was Jay Z and not some asshole who's decided to imitate Jay Z rather than some rapper with actual talent.

Or something. Rest assured, this was all way more awesome in the original post that has now disappeared.

The important thing to remember is that the Packers won and I drank a million beers and was drunk by 4:30pm yesterday, extending my classy streak by one more day.

Stella!!!

Addendum to my previous pronouncement--

I think we're all in agreement that this month can just go to hell and die.

Remind me again why alcoholism is a bad thing? Because right now it seems like it would be convenient in that I would be drunk and, like, drunk all the time? Did I mention I would be drunk all the time? Because that seems super awesome right about now? Also I bought beer today instead of wine!!!

Tomorrow=Packers bar and more drinking!

aspirations

I don't even know what it's about or when I'll get around to reading it, but I just discovered there is a book called Another Bullshit Night in Suck City, and I just really hope that when I write a book, it has a name as awesome as that.

Especially if this hypothetical book is about US Foreign Policy in mid-twentieth century Latin America, as I sincerely hope it will be.

As for me, I will die no doubt of inertia.

I think we're all in agreement that today sucks and should stop being so dumb.

"i'm killing that shit"

Wow, sometimes I think I have a dirty mouth, and then the damn kids who stand outside my window all night breaking bottles and yelling at each other, those damn kids break out the "faggots" and the rape threats and the "suck my fucking dick you fucking cocksucker" and those damn kids just put me to shame.

In other news, my cats are still crazy. Maybe crazier!

the emails

From: mom
To: dad, marinatina
Date: Sep 20, 2006 9:38 AM
Subject: Pure pleasure

This is so fun! Especially for FDR fans.
http://www.dailykos.com/story/2006/9/20/73653/7046



From: marinatina
To: mom
Date: Sep 20, 2006 9:44 AM
Subject: Re: Pure pleasure

I would thank you not to send me any more emails with "pure pleasure" in the subject line, MOM.

From: mom
To: marinatina
Date: Sep 20, 2006 9:52 AM
Subject: RE: Pure pleasure

What, you prefer impure pleasures???For shame!!

From: marinatina
To: mom
Date: Sep 20, 2006 9:57 AM
Subject: Re: Pure pleasure

CREEPY STOP EMAILING ME CREEPY MOM PERSON

From: mom
To: marinatina
Date: Sep 20, 2006 9:59 AM
Subject: NORMAL mom stuff

How's this, then?

Marina,
Why don't you ever call your mother? Are you eating healthy foods? How many minutes of exercise are you getting each day? Have you quit smoking yet? Would it kill you to get married and start a family already???

From: marinatina
To: mom
Date: Sep 20, 2006 10:20 AM
Subject: Re: NORMAL mom stuff

touche, weird mom. touche.

From: marinatina
To: mom
Date: Sep 20, 2006 10:21 AM
Subject: Re: NORMAL mom stuff

i'm going to tell dad you told me to have a baby.

From: mom
To: marinatina
Date: Sep 20, 2006 10:46 AM
Subject: RE: NORMAL mom stuff

That's fine, I'll tell him you told me to have a baby

From: marinatina
To: mom
Date: Sep 20, 2006 11:01 AM
Subject: Re: NORMAL mom stuff

bah. you win.

From: mom
To: marinatina
Date: Sep 20, 2006 11:09 AM
Subject: RE: NORMAL mom stuff

ha!

unique female model wanted

unique female model wanted
Originally uploaded by marinatina.

translation: unique female model wanted FOR ANAL SEX

addendum: It is much funnier to add FOR ANAL SEX to the end of fortune cookie fortunes than it is to add "in bed." example: according to a recent stale post-take-out pastry, "[I] will soon win an award FOR ANAL SEX."