09 November 2006


GRE word of the day:

prec·i·pice n.
1. An overhanging or extremely steep mass of rock, such as a crag or the face of a cliff.
2. The brink of a dangerous or disastrous situation: on the precipice of defeat.

I am feeling indecisive. And I am feeling that things are about to change in a way that I can't anticipate. I can't even really explain what I mean, and I've been trying for at least the past five minutes.

At some point about a month and a half ago (maybe two?), I stopped writing and reading and doing anything of value. I'm not going to bore you with details, at least not yet because I'm not sure I can explain it well, but I think maybe things are getting better rather than worse. Phase II of my aforementioned project is not an option, which was not my decision. The rejection is difficult to handle, but I think I'll be happier without doing Phase II. I feel like I've been half-awake for so long, only doing enough to get through the day, but now maybe I'm finally ready to do more than the bare minimum. Maybe?

I think I've gotten dumber since graduation. I think this is all graduation-related angst. I find it hard to take myself seriously enough to actually write about my "angst," and I also find it hard to write when I've spent the past two months doing nothing but sleep, work, and watch TV online. Oh, and let's not forget all the time I spend reading gawker.com.

I don't really know how to wrap this up... I'm just happy that I'm excited about life. Well, maybe not excited... cautiously optimistic might be closer to the truth.

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